Prophetic Dream: Stewarding Kingdom Wealth: Only Put Your Money On What Has Value

Jan 3, 2023 (between 12am-2am)

Last night I had a dream. I must have been a little kid even though I was in my adult body, because I was in this kid’s toy section of a shop and my mum told me that she would just buy me one thing. This wasn’t a major supermarket, but it reminded me of a small shop the family stopped at when we visited The Blue Mountains.
So, I started pulling items from the hooks they were hanging on. There was a plastic toy of Scooby Doo which I seemed to love for some reason. But I felt like even as a small child it wasn’t worth the price. So I picked up a futuristic looking toy gun which felt like it was worth the price more than the Scooby Doo toy. But it still felt like a waste. I think the other toy I was looking at was an aeroplane because I like planes. But they were the usual types of toys I used to like when I was a kid.
Mum was hurrying me because she was getting ready to leave, and she was like make a decision now or you’re getting nothing. Or I felt that’s what was going to happen.

But then the adult version of me thought, “Why do I want to get this junk? I’m trying to give my things away. I don’t need more things.”

And I feel like The Holy Spirit is telling me to only put my money on what has value. He kind of responded to some anxiety I had about being a good steward of Kingdom wealth. In the Kingdom of God Heaven will provide the opportunities to make money and sometimes the finances and it’s up to us to show we can steward that wealth well. It’s usually to put towards the expenses our assignments require, and giving to charities or even helping people in need.

So God is telling those of us on the Kingdom payroll: only put your money on what has value. You can still buy the things you need, but those don’t have to be the most expensive version. Take for example just buying the basics like clothes, appliances, furniture, a new phone, laptop, computer, iPad. You should only buy the things you need. For example, I would probably need a new computer soon with the kind of software I need to make videos for my Youtube channel. Although a laptop would be better for livestreams. That’s a necessary expenditure from the money Heaven may give me. I also need furniture, clothes that don’t have holes in them – I procrastinate buying even the basic things I need ok? I grew up poor and during the pandemic, particularly when I had Long COVID I barely bought any new clothes. Why dress in new clothes when you can’t even go out?

I’m kind of like Paul where I’m just content to live on very little and even a lot. 

I operate from the Hebrew calendar and I’ve been doing that since July, because it’s the calendar God operates from. For example between September – October during Sukkot, He was trying to draw the Church closer to Him which is parallel to what the Israelites did after they came out of captivity in Egypt. There was both The Festival of Shelters and Sukkot. All the instructions for those appointed times should be available in Leviticus.
During November and December not much was going on in the Hebrew calendar that pertained to God’s appointed festivals or events in the Bible, so I didn’t pay much attention to it. But now we’re in January and The Holy Spirit keeps bringing specific dates to mind, I decided to go back to it and I saw that on January 25 it’s The New Years For Trees: a season where the new blooming trees is Israel begin to start producing fruit. And I feel like The Holy Spirit is saying this is a season where we, the children of God, are encouraged to produce fruit, and that could be in the form of completing assignments for the Kingdom. And I have been doing an assignment a day since the new year started. Even what we do with our finances shows what fruit we have and produce more of.

According to Hebrew tradition on this day we remember that ‘man is the tree of the field’ (Deut 20:19).

Scripture Verses That Reference This Word
Luke 16:10-13 – “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities. And if you are untrustworthy about worldly wealth, who will trust you with the true riches of Heaven? And if you are not faithful with other people’s things, why should you be trusted with things of your own?
No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.” (NLT)

The New King James version puts it this way: “Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” Mammon is of course the god of money. Putting our dependence in money, not just becoming greedy over money, is a form of idolatry.

Matthew 25:28-29 – “So take that bag of gold from him and give it to the one who has ten bags. For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. And throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”

These two parables in Matthew 25 all start off saying, “The Kingdom of God is like…” so that last verse feels like a warning to steward wealth well and produce good fruit or you could lose your position in the Kingdom of God. At least no longer being trusted to steward that wealth. I’m not saying you’ll be kicked out of eternity. We’re talking about the Kingdom of God as it is on earth now; invisible and not quite in its fullness.

How God Helps Me Manage My Mental Health

Today is World Mental Health day so I thought I’d take this opportunity to talk about how God through His Holy Spirit has helped me manage my mental health issues better.

I’m going to give a trigger warning here: if you are not at least charismatic you will find the following offensive or will just disregard it as Pentecostal twaddle. It also mentions feelings of suicide and self-harm. 

So, I’m going to start talking about all the mental health issues I have had to deal with in my life and how my faith in God has helped minimise them. 

I was born with a form of autism called pathological demand avoidance syndrome which is characterised by becoming resistant to anything asked of you, no matter how the order is given, because it provokes a severe anxious response. 

I think around March/April this year the Holy Spirit really dealt with this by revealing to me that I didn’t respect authority, and He got me to start by becoming more obedient and respectful to the leadership in my church. And from this I realised He wanted me to be more obedient to God, which is very important for a prophet to be.

My PDA also triggered every time I would be sitting with a group who was praying, and I’d get hot and sweaty at the pressure I felt to pray out loud. I had been this way since I was 13 when I’d be pressured by my classmates to pray. During early morning roll call I would even pray to God to not be called on by my teacher to lead the prayer.

So I had some social anxiety. 

I asked my lead pastor to pray for my PDA to be more manageable, and over the weeks I noticed it started to be. But as my relationship with Jesus increased as I spent more and more time in private worship and because of the intense presence of God surrounding me, my transformation accelerated. This had started since the Asbury revival and just grew stronger over the weeks and months.

My pastor also prayed for my PTSD and I was surprised that an evil spirit came out of me when he said the word ‘trauma.’ This was because of the glory of God in the room during our night of prayer and healing. What we call ‘ministry time.’ Also, when another pastor prayed for my depression (which I now realise was caused by the spirit of Leviathan) an evil spirit came out of me too. This is because they can attach and amplify negative emotions, and possess us this way. They can also cause these symptoms. That day I became depressed out of nowhere.

I overcame my fear of praying out loud when the Holy Spirit revealed to me that when living stones come closer together they start to chisel against each other, causing heat and pressure. This is because these stones have to fit so closely together to make up the temple of the Lord. Essentially to overcome my anxiety I had to embrace the pressure and heat. And I did and now I often volunteer to say grace out loud, pray for those who need healing, and I’ve prophesied over 15 people at my church. 

The Holy Spirit also dealt with my pride by making me just let go in worship by allowing myself to look foolish to others. I went from too anxious to sing and worship in church to the most Pentecostal worshiper in a church that definitely isn’t. 

Let me go back to my younger years again. When I was 5 I developed a severe form of social anxiety called selective mutism, which is very common in autism. I was too afraid to speak outside of my home and I barely spoke there. This lasted for about 9 years, but took another 10-15 years to come out of enough to start speaking to people. And I still deal with it from time to time. 

I eventually found out that the enemy had done everything he could to keep me silent and to be silenced by others because of the calling God had on my life. When I prophesy I prophesy with boldness, and I have very rarely been quiet at my church. There have been moments where I have kept silent but mostly I am a loud overexcited impulsive person, but the Holy Spirit has given me anointings to control this, who reluctantly pushes out some small talk and then skews it over into speaking the Word and words of God. My church could not imagine how silent I was as a child even if they tried. Not a single child at the church is like that.

What helps me deal with anxiety is to say something like ‘I break the spirit of anxiety over me, in the name of Jesus.’ Because of the constant barrage of enemy attacks that at times are not just physical but visual, Jesus made me a curse breaker. Now I know we all can’t be curse breakers but we can all pray and ask others to pray for us. It may not happen as fast as speaking the words, but it will eventually happen. I do the same for my OCD which I struggle with a lot. 

When I was 12 I developed depression and by my mid twenties that depression was expressed through my bipolar. I say similar things to break depression off of me. This is most often because the enemy will bring depressive thoughts to my mind, and take opportunities to exploit my depression when it triggers. That can then develop into feelings of suicide and self harm. But I can curse break that too. Or ask the Holy Spirit to make me feel peace and joy. I manage my bipolar pretty well these days and that’s because the Holy Spirit revealed to me the kinds of food that triggered it. And I’m allergic to alcohol and can’t take medication like antidepressants. I actually have severe reactions to antidepressants so I can’t take them at all. 

Now, I’m not saying don’t get professional help or take medication. I have done that in the past. I just found it was a lot of money for a marginal improvement that did not last overtime. I have found the most effective help for my mental health issues has been a combination of reading the Word of God, spending time in the deep presence of God which will impart the Living Waters from within and release the fruits of the Spirit, fellowship with my Christian community, and the combined healing powers of both the Holy Spirit and the angels of the Lord. Of course, Jesus speaking through the Holy Spirit has been an incredible comfort to me in times of severe distress caused by loneliness, times of rejection, the enemy attacking me through those most closest to me, financial issues, anxiety about the future, and times of disappointment when prophecies spoken over my life or given by me still have not come to pass. 

At times of dealing with severe trauma there is something I do where I request to go to the Glory Realm. This is the Throne Room of God, what Paul calls the third Heaven. Here there is no time and time can even be bent to go backward, which is what God did when He turned time back and gave Hezekiah 15 more years to live. You can still ask God to turn back the clock on your trauma and He will do it. And it takes a second. 

I told you I was going to get Pentecostal in here. But seriously, I am so grateful that I can do this. God has undone some of the most heartbreaking trauma in my life this way. I still remember it but it no longer affects me emotionally. 

I know this is a very unusual post for World Mental Health day. But this is what I do to help me, and my mental health issues are nowhere near mild. I used deal with being suicidal for 3 days of the week, and then fly into extreme bouts of mania. I’ve had severe anxiety all my life and have to deal with OCD, PMDD, GAD, and every other type of anxiety you can think of. I’ve had addictions, some that could have only been beaten by seeing the glory of God.

I know this is pretty hard for both unbelievers and some types of believers to understand, so I will be adding some discernment to it soon. I just don’t have time at the moment. All of this can be backed up using the Word of God.

The Apostle of Peace

Issachar Anointing Prophecy

The following is a prophecy about a new army God will raise up in the global Church (Judges 5:14-15). It’s been prophesied by many people, so I’m here to add details that have been given to me by the Holy Spirit over the months. The Issachar anointing has been known by prophets for a long time too but no one has yet made the connection that they will be this new army of the Lord. I was given the Issachar anointing 2 months ago and I have spent the last few weeks prophesying over church members who I’ve been told will receive the Issachar anointing soon. It will give them the fire of God, which will unlock a passion for God and declaring the Gospel, and a boldness of faith to do this all with both mental and emotional strength, as well as a rejuvenation of energy. It’s perhaps the most supernatural anointing I have ever experienced and those who witness me with it activated have seen a complete turn around of my personality.

The Father says,

The hour is almost upon us when God will call His sons and daughters of Issachar (Gen 35:23, 1 Chron 12:32, Joel 2:28-29). He will rain down holy fire upon them baptising them in the Holy Spirit (Luke 3:16, Acts 2:3). You will know them by the heavenly tongues (Acts 2:4;10:44-46,1 Cor 14:2) they don’t just speak in your churches – yes, even your cessationist churches (2 Tim 3:5) – but they will bellow them! I, the Father have spoken these very words and I give authority to my pioneer (Amos 9:14), a recruitment officer in My army (1 Chron 7:5), to not just lead and train this company of elite soldiers to fight against the spirit of the antichrist infecting churches (Matt 24:24, 1 John 5:3, Jude 3-4,10-16), but restore My Son’s Throne in them (Matt 16:18, Eph 4:11, 1 Peter 2:4-5), leading My children back to having a close relationship to Him by the full empowering of the Holy Spirit working in their lives, manifesting from their hearts (Rom 2:29,8:27,Gal 5:16-26).

This new Tribe of Issachar will then be able to educate and encourage the Church to live their life fully surrendered to My Son (Matt 13:8;23, John 15:4-5), and as carriers of My Spirit’s glory, this tribe will then along with the assistance of angels, usher in the largest outpouring of the glory the earth has ever known (Hab 2:14, Rev 7:9). And then will begin the largest harvest of souls — or mass repentance (Acts 2:41,9:31)— that has ever occurred in the history of the world, before that great and dark day comes (Matt 24:9-11;19-22, Rev 6, 8:6-13,9:18, 13:1-18).

For I, the Lord, have spoken!

Remember this prophecy so it may help you fight in the Lord’s battles in the coming days (1 Tim 1:18). Dark times are ahead for the Church. Now your eyes are open you can never see it the same again. It’s no longer a safe mainstream church where you hear a Sunday sermon which you’ll forget during the week, have a bit of fellowship, go to church events, and rinse and repeat. Real evil is at work there making you apathetic, complacent and in a spiritual slumber. This is the spirit of Leviathan that also causes division between church members (Job 41:1-9,22-34, Gal 5:15). It’s time to wake up and join the battle against the armies of Hell that have plagued our churches for so long. This battle is about to intensify and the churches are about to fall straight into Satan’s hands if God doesn’t intervene with His new army — the fearless warriors of the tribe of Issachar.

Biblical references to the Tribe of Issachar

Issachar was the 9th son of Jacob (Genesis 35:23). His descendants made up the Tribe of Issachar, one of whom was Tola, a judge of Israel for 23 years (Judges 20:1-2). It says he rose to save Israel. They were powerful prophets who knew the signs of the times and knew just what Israel ought to do (1 Chronicles 12:32). They were also good problem solvers or came up with ideas that got the approval of others (Numbers 7:2-3).

So, the new Tribe of Issachar will be leaders and will know how to solve the world’s upcoming problems, and perhaps in the churches. I have prophesied a remnant would come that would help rebuild churches who had been judged by God (Amos 5:2-3; 11-12, Amos 6:4-7; 11) for their corruption, through Him exposing their sins in the form of exposing scandals, or compromising His Word (2 Peter 2:1-3), and we are already seeing this with Hillsong and the Church of England. The remnant (Ezra 2:1; 64-65) aren’t just going to rebuild churches (Amos 9:11-12), but help heal those who have been affected by the corruption, the legalism, and have emotional and mental wounds that need to be dressed (Psalm 28:6-9, 29:11, Exodus 3:14, Phillippians 4:5-72, Chronicles 7:14, Revelation 21:4). The third son of Issachar was Job or Jashub (Genesis 46:13), and this name means “to cry out,” so the new tribe can carry the burden of others, they are natural  intercessors. There is a great need to help and heal the hurting. 

The second son of Issachar was called Puah or Puvah, which means “to blast like a trumpet,” and this describes the boldness to declare prophecy that the anointing brings. But there is also love, mercy, and empathy when delivering these messages.

The Tribe of Issachar are described in 1 Chronicles 7:2,5 as being fighting men or mighty men of valor, and the Issachar anointing brings mental and emotional strength to be able to combat opposition and rejection and deal better with emotions like anxiety and depression. They are strengthened by God through the Holy Spirit’s power. The tribe is one of the armies that helped establish David as King (1 Chronicles 12:23-40).

Jacob blessed Issachar by saying he is a strong boned donkey, who crouches between the sheepfolds. He saw that a resting place was good and the land was pleasant, and he bowed his shoulder to bear and became a task worker (Genesis 49:14-15). 

To me this speaks of toughness and steadfastness, a protector of the Lord’s sheep and someone who is prepared to work hard for the Lord. A sheepfold can be seen to be a denomination or a type of church, but the donkey is in between them, not part of them. Donkeys were actually used to protect the flock from coyotes in ancient times.  

Another Puah in the Bible means ‘words to soothe a crying baby.’ She was one of the midwives who refused Pharaoh’s command to kill the male children (Exodus 1:15), which means the tribe are defenders of those who can’t defend themselves.

The Apostle of Peace

Prophecy: A SHIFT has happened in the global Church

A shift has happened in the Church (Isaiah 43:19). In my very last prophecy to my church I said ‘the Church is in a transition.’ I painted this picture of the transition as being like the Israelites leaving their captivity in Egypt and entering a transition period of being in the wilderness and entering the Promised Land (Joshua 1:2-3). This was speaking of the past. The shift is here. Evidence will be seen this weekend. God is shaking up the churches of the world (1 Peter 4:17). He has already shaken them through exposing corruption and dealt with the guilty parties swiftly and severely (1 Cor 3:17,5:2-12,6:9-10). He is not done there (1 Cor 4:2,5;5:3-6,6-7,11;6:9-10).

Churches are going through a period of testing and trial (Lam 2:3, 1 Peter 4:1, 5:12-13, Rev 3:10), the same testing Jesus told the church in Philadelphia they could be spared from. The churches He wrote the letters to represented types of churches in the world today. There are the lukewarm Christians (Rev 3:16) who Jesus wants to spit out of His mouth. There are the churches who flirt with the false pagan gods (Rev 2:14), which can be seen by them giving into worldly desires (2 Peter 1:14, 1 John 2:15-16) and inviting worldly influence into their churches (Isaiah 31:1-3). There are those who are spiritually dead (Rev 2:4-5, 3:1-3). And there are those who practice sexual immorality (Rev 2:14-16). 

God is shaking up the very way we do church (Isaiah 43:19, Haggai 2:6, Hebrews 12:26-27). He is dismantling the man made structures, including the ministry departments. Liturgies will be a thing of the past. Man made traditions which cannot be found in scripture will seem like ancient rituals lost to time. 

The revivals that happened around the world were not just for reformation, indeed, no revival ever was, but to bring the Church back to God’s original design: the Church of the first century, the ekklesia of God (Acts 15:16-18, Ephesians 4:11-13), that was born on the Day of Pentecost, when the power of the Holy Spirit came onto the believers (Acts 2:2), empowering them for continuing Jesus’ mission on earth (Acts 9:10-16, 10:1-20). They lived very simple unmaterialistic lives, shared their possessions (Acts 4:32), gave to those in need (Acts 4:34), broke bread with others in homes and had deep intimate relationships (1 Peter 1:22) with each other and were never in lack (Acts 4:33, 2 Cor 8:9, 9:8, Phil 4:19, 2 Peter 1:3), because God gave them everything they needed (Acts 2:44-46). They were a living breathing spiritual organism, the actual Body of Christ which connected to Him as Head of His Church (Matthew 16:18; Colossians 1:18), that was 100% spiritual, not the 75% or so we are content to have these days. The meetings were completely led by the Holy Spirit and the gifts were used for Jesus to speak through His people to each other to encourage, admonish, exhort, direct and comfort. 

There will be resistance to this, but if God wants to do this then nothing and no one can stop Him, and anyone who tries to get in the way of His plans He will be push aside. In most extreme cases He will strip leaders of their position and bring in a leadership that is more aligned to His heart and who wants to see His plans and purposes for His churches fulfilled (1 Sam 15:26,16:7;13, 1 Cor 5:3-6).

Through these next round of revivals God will yet again pour out the spiritual gifts (Joel 2:28-29, Acts 2:17-18, 1 Cor 12:7-10) – some churches have already experienced this – to equip the Body of Christ as an army that joins with the armies of Heaven to wage war on both their enemy and ours (Eph 6:12), and the people who they work through on earth. Witches who think they can innocently contact spirits (1 Sam 28:3,7-14), but they’ve really contacted familiar spirits – demons (1 Tim 4:1) – who have instructed them to attack God’s prophets (Matt 7:20), so they can come into our churches as false prophets (Matt 7:15-17, Matt 24:24 2 Cor 11:3-4;12-15, 2 Peter 2:1-2, 1 John 4:2-3). They aren’t adept at scripture and as prophesied by the apostle Paul, they will not call Jesus the Son of God (1 Cor 12:3) and will not say that He went to the cross, died and was resurrected. And now sits at the right hand of God as Lord of all.

We are in a time of spiritual warfare while the churches are having a beach party (Matt 25:38-39), as the enemy has set up a beachhead. They are on the advance. They have already infiltrated the churches, and have for years. That’s why we need to take Romans 12:2 seriously and commit to renewing our minds everyday, and take every thought and hold it captive, because failing to do this just once, invites the enemy to influence our thinking, then our personality and then our very behaviour. This creates division (Matt 12:25) and distraction in the churches. And the enemy has used this to delay the next worldwide revival, which will be the most largest season of revival this earth has ever seen. This is to save as many souls as possible (2 Peter 3:9) before the real darkness begins. God is already pouring out His Spirit on churches and individual Christians who seek Him with such ferocity that they are pinned to the floor. The enemy won’t let this happen because they know what will come next. Churches around the world will rise up as fortresses in the earth, and places of sanctuary where we will see mass repentance with spontaneous baptisms (Acts 2:4:1,8:12;36-38,9:18,10:48).  

A remnant will rise out of the churches (Ezra 8:1-14). Some of them already know who they are. Some are yet to be called. They are the most committed followers of God; the ones who will return to Jerusalem to rebuild the city and return the Temple of God to her former glory (Isaiah 52:7-9). They are a generation of elite soldiers (1 Chron 7:2,5) who stand on the frontlines of the spiritual battleground (2 Cor 10:3-5), defending and protecting the flock (Genesis 49:14-15). Some will know the signs of the times and come up with the solutions to the problems the world will soon face (1 Chron 12:32). Listen to them. They are going to give you the very survival skills you need to face things soon to come, such as famine, plagues (another pandemic), warn of the health effects of genetically modified food, the world officially adopting digital currency as its own (Rev 13:16-17), and the enemy overtaking the churches. Some will be intercessors with the ability to take on the burdens of others with supernatural strength (Gal 6:2, Eph 6:18). They’ve been given a powerful spiritual anointing for such a time as this (Isaiah 45:5). They are known by many names: the new tribe of Issachar (Gen 35:23, Judges 30:1-2), the Joseph anointing, and the Elijah generation. They are all those things and more. 

I am a leader for this generation for the territory God has given me jurisdiction. My responsibility is to find, educate and anoint through the authority Christ has given me (2 Cor 10:8), those chosen to lead their churches to revival (Isaiah 45:8), to turn them back to God, through restructuring and rebuilding them (Jeremiah 52:16) and providing healing to those Christians who have been disillusioned by the revelation of corruption in their former churches or have been victims of sexual, physical or spiritual abuse within them (Amos 9:11). It is our duty to help them through the process of deconstructing and reconstructing their faith, and removing those mental strongholds of religion and legalism the enemy had trapped them in.

The remnant will be used as weapons in the ongoing fight for churches to stay true to the Word of God. The enemy has already introduced a gospel that is less about repentance but more about grace and a gospel of inclusion that is tearing the Church apart. Taking sides and running to more pleasing denominations that better fit your beliefs is not the answer, but unity in the Body of Christ. By separating ourselves from these misguided churches we will just assure that the problem will just get worse. It is now more important than ever to become proficient in the scriptures, write them in our hearts, and stand firmly on them (Hebrews 2:1-2). Because there will be a day when both progressive Christianity and libertinism (2 Tim 3:8, 4:3-4) will outnumber staying true to the Word through accurate teachings of scripture (John 8:31-32, 1 Tim 6:3-5). And persecution to God’s true Church will return (Matt 24:9-11). Even in the west governments will turn against people who remain true to the Word. They will slander them (Matt 12:24, 2 Peter 2:2) and all of society will cheer them on (Acts 12:3).

Now it is more important than ever to study the scriptures, spend time in the Lord’s presence, pray throughout the day for yourself and others, especially your church leaders, so they do not fall into the snare of the enemy and be used as weapons against God’s promises in the very churches they are teaching and guiding. Stay in your community, find a trusted group of believers to fellowship with regularly, support and encourage one another, pray for each other, and do not be tempted into pointless arguments against Christians of other denominations. Meet everyone with love, including those you don’t agree with. And most importantly, keep your minded guarded from the enemy.

And listen to the prophets and prepare for the time that is ahead. If you have any questions or want more details on the world’s coming problems, then either seek out the prophecies in books or online, or ask me and I will request, through prayer and fasting, more revelation on the subjects. But one prophet I highly regard and trust is Joshua Giles, who you can find on YouTube. But I highly recommend you read his book ‘Prophetic Forecast’ for more information about some of the signs of the times.

If you want some of this scriptural discernment explained to you, I will be happy to give more details. The Holy Spirit just puts these passages into my head and there’s more prophecy to their interpretation. To keep this post short I decided to explain very little of it.

Your Comrade in Christ,

The Apostle of Peace

How to Know Jesus is Calling You for More

This is an old post that has been sitting in my drafts for almost a year. It was written at a time when I was new at to Anchor City Church and I struggled to fit in with the community. I’ve been feeling that way again…at least some of the information contained within still resonates with me. And I’m going through part 3 of God’s attempt to empty the world out of me, which is basically a repeat of part 1, just with an increase of testing. So I thought I’d share.

Also note: there’s a lot of things I mention in here that I don’t really experience anymore. I can get spiritual discussions at church. This was a long period of isolation for me that ended exactly on the 25th of June. I love my tribe at church. The Holy Spirit also speaks to me of the prophecies He’s given me or introduces me to a new one, so I can hold both the main sermon and the prophetic words He gives me in my head. And I find the sermons to be inspiring enough that sometimes I don’t even need the Spirit to speak for me. But you know I always want to hear what He wants to tell me. And I have just really transformed a lot since writing this. I was able to break my social media addiction.

This post mainly goes through the possible stages of Jesus calling you to do more than being a Sunday Christian. It’s for those serious Christians who strive for something more. A deeper relationship to Jesus, and resist the weekly distractions that lead you away from that. And maybe, just maybe He may use you to advance His kingdom. It’s written in a way that’s relatable to most who go through this. While some come from my own personal experience it’s not exactly how it happened, and it’s not the order it happened in.

I’m writing this so people understand my physical and mental health issues are not just regular physical and mental health issues. These come from being tested and disciplined by God. I’ll go through it in a more detailed blog once this trial is over.

1. Spiritually Attention Deficit

Though I’d start here, seeing as ADHD Awareness Month is just around the corner. But this has nothing to do with that. Being spiritually ADHD is better described as being like a gifted child who finishes all their schoolwork. Now they’re bored, unfocused, restless and annoying other classmates. They’re fidgeting and can’t sit still. They get kicked out of class or sent to detention for misbehaving.

Likewise, if you’ve heard it all before and want to hear a much deeper sermon you’re going to find it hard to pay attention. You want to be challenged but this sermon sounds so familiar you’ve got déjà vue. Your spirit is thirsting for more but you can’t quite work out what that is yet.

By the way, if I’ve ever praised your sermon or said it helped me, that’s not spiritual ADHD. That’s just ADHD. 

2. Spiritually Empty

This can happen in two ways. The first way is after hearing a so-so sermon that leaves you feeling underwhelmed and there’s this void in your soul waiting to be filled up. You’re left spiritually empty. You’re going through the motions each Sunday, and throughout the rest of the week you’ve forgotten the sermon and rather rant about some other denomination on social media you don’t agree with. You’re also laughing at cute foxes on Instagram because you need some excitement in your life. Then you go on Twitter, see what’s trending and get into an argument you care nothing about. 

The second part of this is you want to discuss the Christian literature/Bible passages you’ve been reading throughout the week that have helped you grow spiritually, but can only find casual conversation. Any attempts at a biblical discussion fizzle out as no one is interested in learning more. Again that void in your soul thirsting for a deeper connection with your fellow Christians is left empty.

3.  Spiritual Depression 

During the week you’re getting a lot of inspiration and insight from scripture and the Christian books/articles you’re reading are helping you through a stressful situation. You’re so passionate about it, you want to share it with somebody because maybe it could help them too, but people aren’t interested. So you’re left disappointed, depressed. You’re just dragging your feet through the week, getting the same routine done each day. Now you’re so unmotivated you can barely read your Bible or even a Christian article emailed to you. 

The best you can do is correct atheists on their deliberate misinterpretations of scripture and wonder what even is Catholic Twitter banging on about. But you’re bored and find the gossip kind of exciting. It’s the most excitement you can get out of the church. 

4. Spiritual Frustration

Your empty soul is screaming out for more. The same void Adam felt over the lack of companionship (before Eve was created) you feel over your lack of connection with other Christians. It’s the same yearning the Son had for His bride (the Church). It’s your need for a close relationship with another human. 

Frank Viola calls this the ‘connection economy’ and it’s sorely lacking in mainstream churches. It’s when building connections with likeminded people is more important than buying more things. It encourages, builds people up and helps all involved grow a deeper spiritual connection to Christ. People open up about their deep spiritual wounds, share with others how they were healed to give hope to those who are still going through the same thing, or will go through it. 

5. Spiritual Boredom

There’s no one to share your insights from The Holy Spirit, no one to share ideas with about how to grow the church. So your mind begins to wander. Feeling dejected, rejected and seeking a sense of belonging you wander back into your old sinful life. Your old friends welcome you back with open arms, and offer you a drink. That void in your heart that yearned for companionship with your fellow Man begins to fill, but fills up with the wrong type of companionship.

6. Spiritual Apathy (Apatheism)

Now you just don’t care about Christianity. The Bible, Jesus, the inheritance – none of it! All that rule following felt too hard anyway. You take comfort in the loose living, crude jokes, sexual immorality and disregard of the rules you see around you. You comfortably fit right back in. You finally feel free but little do you know you’ve embraced the shackles of the world’s slavery with open arms. 

But this is only one of two ways this could go.

7. Spiritual Awakening 

Somehow, you’ve come back to Jesus. He just doesn’t seem to want to leave you alone, dropping all these little hints in the environment to come back to Him. So you try your best to be a good Christian again. But it’s hard. Distractions are all around you. You can’t stop arguing on social media. You’re wondering if the video games you’re playing are just too violent, and they’re taking you away from studying the Word. Temptations seem to be everywhere. You’re fighting a porn addiction that just won’t stop invading your mind.

Then one day you find out that thing you were seeking all along: developing a deeper relationship with Christ. Now it seems easy to avoid all those distractions. You quit porn cold turkey and never look back. You find a network of deep Christians to learn from, encourage and share biblical insights with. 

8. Spiritual Trials 

Everything was going so fine, but now you’re in a freefall. There’s no ground beneath your feet, there’s nothing to hold onto to stop your fall. Your whole life is falling apart. It could be relationship problems, financial issues, health problems, or anything else causing deep stress in your life. 

You cry out to God and He says: wait, just give control to me and everything will work out. You ask why this is happening? He says something like there’s parts of your life that need to change if you really want to work for My kingdom. 

9. Spiritual Anxiety

You agree to wait on the Lord, but then you get antsy. Wait how long, O’Lord? He doesn’t say, in fact He’s gone a bit quiet. Sometimes God hides His face. You no longer feel the presence of God and you feel all alone. The stress and anxiety overtake you so you go back on your agreement and try to fix the problem yourself, and escape this desert He put you in. 

That was an epic mistake. 

10. Spiritual Transformation 

After all the crying and swearing and breaking things you yet again agree to wait on the Lord, who is now speaking to you again. Then the enemy hits you with temptation after temptation. Strange temptations, things you’d never feel tempted by before. The attack is unrelenting. It feels like you have a compulsion you have to act out, except acting out on this compulsion is giving into the temptation. It’s emotional torture. It’s like someone set fire to your brain. It feels unfair. It doesn’t feel like it’s a really bad sin. It’s not evil, it’s just worldly. You can’t understand why you can’t do this when other Christians can. 

Still, you know what you have to do, you have to rebuke the world completely. Get rid of those things in your life, including some of your behaviours, God tells you to. 

So you write Him a heartfelt letter, ask Him to transform you – you’ll do anything! You know not to say that prayer lightly, but you’re desperate. You want the temptation to stop. Your skin is crawling, your head is aching, your chest is tight and you can’t settle down.

Then, you feel it. Clean slate. Your mind is transformed. Now avoiding the temptations of the world seems easy. 

But it doesn’t last long. You always have to expect a new attack. Now the world is pulling you back down, while Jesus is pulling you up.

Eventually, the temptation will stop. The freefall will stop and you can get out of the desert and be met with an outpouring of blessing. Maybe you’ll get a chance to fufill that call God has on your life.

But your transformation into the image of Christ isn’t anywhere near complete.

“Transformation is a slow and arduous process” – Frank Viola

It can take your whole life. But the aim is to keep transforming to become more like Christ, and leave your sinful impurities behind so you can get past that ticket gate to the Kingdom of God.

By the way this wasn’t the post I was meaning to write for months. Jesus is not letting me write that one…yet.

The Apostle of Peace

How God Can Help You Manage Mental Illness

It doesn’t matter what religion you have or if you have any, everyone would agree that people have their own ways to manage their mental health issues. If you disagree then you should open your mind up because not every approach works for everyone. 

Christians have their own way of managing their mental health but instead of coming up with coping mechanisms, going to therapy or taking medication they seek first the Scriptures. I’m not saying that if anyone does those things, even if they are Christian, that it’s wrong. Like I said, everyone has their own way of managing their mental health. And not every Christian does first go to the Bible for guidance, but I would encourage them to because of the wisdom to be found there that applies to past and future generations. It is not an ancient book that has become irrelevant to modern society as many non-believers would have you think.

In the Book of Matthew Jesus instructs his audience to not worry because His father would provide for them, and if the birds in the sky do not store up food but are always provided for, should God not also provide for us, who He cares deeply for? (Matt 6:26)

On the surface just thinking if we give our worries to God that’s not enough to make them go away, and indeed I thought this most of my life. How can saying words make me feel better? But still I tried it and eventually things did get better for me. It didn’t happen instantly; days or weeks usually passed before I realised the good that was happening in my life was from God.

Take for example financial anxiety. Ever since I moved out of the family home I have been anxious about money. I had a very specific fear that I would eventually starve homeless on the streets if I was not careful with my money. I became a stingy giver if I did give at all, but then it was revealed to me that this wasn’t very healthy of me as a child of God. So, I started to give to those who needed it and I was rewarded for it.

One night when I couldn’t get to sleep because I felt I would soon run out of money to pay the rent and electricity and then I would have to cut out food, and begin starving. Suddenly my thoughts started to come up with a perfect way to budget so I could save a certain amount of money a month. For hours I worked out the calculations in my mind, and I’m very bad at mental math. I checked my calculations in the morning and found I had been correct. I feel this was God sorting out my anxiety around money. And ever since I have not felt as anxious about money. 

The Bible instructs us as Christians to endure our suffering because it is a sign God is working through us to make us stronger, and we will be rewarded for maintaining our faith. When we suffer God is strongest and He will give us strength if we come to Him with our problems. He wants us to rejoice during our suffering, which is easier said than done. It’s still something I’m yet to learn to do. Like everything it takes practice and it takes faith. You need to let the Holy Spirit work in you and change your heart so you will always know Jesus will be there to help you, so you can still praise Him during your trials.

Throughout 2020 and since late 2008 I have struggled with thoughts of suicide. But since becoming a Christian I have barely had them at all. I still go through depression and despair but it gets easier to manage, knowing my Father is watching over me. 

I have tried almost every approach to managing my mental health. I’ve taken medication, used cognitive behavioural therapy and created some coping mechanisms of my own, but those were never enough to bring me peace. Though I still have mental illnesses, just the thought that God will handle my problems, and reward me in this life and the next, is enough to keep my mind at ease. 

I was even worried about writing this blog. The words would just not come or they sounded too pedantic. I have a habit of mimicking the Apostle Paul in my writing style and it’s not the best way to write with emotion and actually reach people in this modern age. I asked God to give me the words to write and indeed that’s what He has done. Because I didn’t even plan today to write this blog post, instead I was going to do further research just so I had all the information ready to go, but He had other plans.

Even when I have failing physical health, like a fungal infection that won’t heal, despite the medications I’ve taken and the strict diet I’ve been on for 9 months, I still believe that eventually God will heal me. I look at the good that has come from it; I have had to completely change my diet to one that’s much healthier, and once I recover I have decided to stick to it. And even though I find myself with an incurable chronic illness that makes me incapable of work and gives me a limited amount of energy, aches, pains and immune and neurological issues, I know one day it will all be over when I meet my King the Lord Jesus Christ, on the new Heaven on Earth, in a new unfailing body. 

So, I encourage you to read the Word of God, the Bible, and recite the following scriptures during those times when it never seems like your anxiety or depression will end, and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ to take those feelings away. Give them to Him to handle and you will feel they are no longer a burden to you, so you can focus on more important things, and enjoy your life again.

-VP

Psalm 56:3

“Whenever I’m afraid, I will trust in you.” 

1 Peter 5:7

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” 

John 8:12

“Jesus spoke to them again: ‘I am the light of the world. Anyone who follows me will never walk in the darkness but will have the light of life.” 

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭4:6-7‬

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”

Psalm 46:1-3

“God is our refuge and strength,

 an ever-present help in trouble.

Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way

and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,

though its waters roar and foam 

and the mountains quake with their surging.”

Isaiah 40:30-31

“Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength.” 

Isaiah 41:10

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” 

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

“But he said to me, ‘my grace is sufficient enough for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ For the sake of Christ then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 

Jeremiah 29:11

“For I know I have plans for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”